When your own boundaries are firmly in place, you protect yourself from being taken down by your loved one’s illness.There may come a point in the relationship when you need to ask some difficult questions: Why are you attracted to this person?
Before diving into a relationship, find out if your prospective partner is actively using drugs or alcohol, or if they display addictive or compulsive patterns in other areas (e.g., gambling, work, sex, food or spending).
If you care about someone in active addiction, help them into treatment and hold off on turning a friendship into more until they’re grounded in their recovery.
For example, you’ll likely need to avoid drinking or using drugs around your partner.
If you go to parties or events where alcohol is being served, you may need to leave early or offer additional support.
In the earliest stages, most recovering addicts are trying to figure out who they are, what they want and how to be in a healthy relationship.
Beyond the first year, the longer someone has maintained their sobriety the more secure you can feel that you’re choosing a partner who is healthy and whole.
But before you put yourself in a position to fall for an addict, there are a few things you need to know: For anyone considering dating an active addict, it is important to realize that love cannot conquer addiction.
Addiction takes priority over everything – you, children, career, financial security, even one’s own freedom.
If a partner relapses, it can be difficult to know what lines to draw.