After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads. I'm not the basket case I was nowadays, but of course my life partner is gone and frankly I'm pretty lonely. I wondered what others' experiences are/ were in this situation. Personally, I like the advice I received when I was widowed myself: wait a year before making any big decisions (like getting involved romantically, selling your house, etc.).
It's my observation that men generally start dating before women because of loneliness.
It was while taking a break from dating that Rob appeared.
It can mean you're cut out for marriage -- you were happy being married and you won't be happy not being married or at least a partner.
You have to be somewhat careful because you wouldn't want someone who feels they must compete with your wife.
This might not be what you want to hear, but these are some of the things I've seen over the years. If you get too involved with a woman, you will be tempted to remarry fast, so move with caution. There are some very nice women out there, but some are much nicer than others.
You are more likely to hit the jackpot if you move slowly.
My dad said he and his wife knew that it was only due to the tragedies of loosing their spouses that they were together, each would have stayed with their first spouse if they could have chosen, but that didn't make their marriage bad -- it was just they way they both knew it was.
My dad said it wasn't the same, his first marriage was as a very young man, to have and build a family with his wife.
Some people even begin dating with weeks or a few months.
But there are those who wait out the so-called year deadline of propriety too, and others who buy wholeheartedly into the notion that they must “work at their grieving” to get it all out of their system before trying to move on in any aspect of their lives, dating included. In my opinion, and experience, when thinking about it begins to more of a logistical “how will I do it” rather than a daydream to chase away sadness, you are probably ready to look into it at the very least.
If you weren’t living your life by committee prior to your spouse’s death, don’t start now. Only introduce them to people you feel you have a future with, and when you do, expect them to behave like well-brought up humans. If problems arise with adult children, remind them that they should spend their time and energy minding their own lives.