But it does seem to provide something that’s been lacking from the world of online-dating trends — some hopeful news that biases may be breaking down and discrimination may be getting weaker as people text their way to love.
It also may prove that Asian women may have already figured out what the folks in Lewis’ study are just finding out — that there’s no harm in reaching out to someone who doesn’t look or think like you.
Those of you that feel insecure and need the approval of others to be okay about your choices will find an interracial relationship to be a source of great stress and confusion.
Minority groups (those who identify themselves on OKCupid as black, Hispanic, Indian or Asian) were much more likely to stay in their own racial lane when in search of mates online. They were more likely to contact white guys than other Asian guys, which my Asian girlfriends tell me is because, in part, they’re not fans of the traditional role that girlfriends and wives have played — and continue to play — in many Asian societies.
They were more likely to respond to white guys too, but then again, all races were most likely to respond to white guys.
Though attraction is certainly a personal issue of taste, I caution readers to stop and think about your choice and why you are making it.
Are you ashamed or embarrassed or in any way attempting to deny parts of yourself by dating interracially?
White folks, both male and female, overwhelmingly made more contact with whites, which is hardly surprising since there are more white people on the site to choose from.
White folks were the most likely to seek out people of another race.
But an intriguing new study of online dating by sociologist Kevin Lewis at the University of California, San Diego, and published by the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences suggests that people might be limiting their choices out of a fear that they’re not attractive to other races.
Lewis examined the interactions of 126,134 newly signed-up members of the online-dating website OKCupid over two and a half months.
Have you subscribed to negative stereotypes about your own race?
A couple embarking on an interracial partnership must prepare themselves for curious stares and racist comments you have never before experienced. If you are not a strong person - mentally and emotionally - then interracial dating is best avoided.
Make it a habit to listen to your partner without judging or comparing him or her to previous partners of some other race.